My Complete Portfolio
The New York Times
Ban Santacon
McSweeney’s
President Obama Announces Changes to the NSA
Slate
Exclusive: The Phone Calls Leading up to the Comcast-Time Warner Merger
Quartz
Republican Candidates for President Order a Burrito from Chipotle
Requirements for Living at my Startup Palace
Chris Christie Is Not Running for Prom King
2015: The Year Everyone at the New Yorker Leaves for a Tech Startup
The 2016 Television Schedule, Disrupted
We Are Excited to Announce Our Merger, with Everything
Headlines That Will Inevitably Be Written about Comcast by the End of the Year
I’d Like to Clarify a Few Previous Comments about my War Experience
The Toast
Orthodox Jewish Indie Music Acts
Fusion
A Trend Story about Millennials, by the New York Times
Here’s How This Lion-Killing Dentist Thing Is Going to Play Out
12 Times I Confused the Middle East for New Jersey, Just Like Ben Carson Did
Syrian Refugees? Who’s Next: The Tired, the Poor, and the Huddled Masses Yearning to Breathe Free?
By Posting This to Facebook, I Hereby Do NOT Give Mark Zuckerberg Permission to Harvest my Soul
Donald Trump’s First 100 Days
Above Average
Now That Monica Lewinsky Is Back, I Thought You Might Want to Hear from Me, Eagle-Eye Cherry
You’re Telling Me I Can’t Shoot my Burrito at Close Range with a Pistol inside the Chipotle Anymore?
Vulture
Why Silicon Valley is Basically the Anti-Entourage
The Party-Vomit Theory of Silicon Valley
The Real Reason to Watch Cutthroat Kitchen Is the Excellent Writing
Medium
Famous Man Owns the Gadget
Some Personal News
Facebook Releases App
Honey, I Think We Should Consciously Uncouple
Explaining the Hyperloop, in Basic Terms
Random Internet
The Most Honest Craigslist Dog-Walking Ad Ever (covered on The Huffington Post, The Daily Dot, Mother Jones, Someecards, Funny Or Die, and more)
Comedic Poems / Collages
A Poem Composed Entirely of SXSW Panel Titles, Yahoo
A Poem Composed Entirely of Mean Tweets about Donald Trump, Fusion
A Poem Composed Entirely of Verbs Used in Headlines about John Oliver Segments, Fusion
A Horror Story Composed Entirely from Sentences Used in Reviews of the Apple Watch, Yahoo
The Internet, from A To Z, Quartz
